How might a romantic relationship help with depression? Here are some early caveats: I’m a layman when it comes to mental illnesses and there are gaps in my argument that might be supported or refuted by empirical studies. Nevertheless, my aim here is to connect some contemporary methodologies of treating mental illness with notions of romantic relationships which adhere to these methodologies. I don’t have a particularly nuanced picture of what entails a romantic relationship, so I appeal to a general notion which features are flushed out through its therapeutic effects. A trivial example would be this: community is generally thought to be important in the recovery of depression; here, a romantic relationship facilitates recovery by having the feature of being interpersonal. I want to outline some more significant features of romantic relationships that aid in recovery which are exclusive to romantic relationships. Then I want to deal with one stream of objections: that even in the most ideal romantic relationship, mental illnesses is exasperated and incompatible with the normative ideas of what constitutes a romantic relationship.

So what sort of contemporary methodologies treat mental illness which aligns with my thesis of the therapeutic benefits of romantic relationships (in a non-trivial way)? The narrative focused method, or the “narrative view.” This contrasts what is often called the “medical view,” which treats patients as a set of symptoms or pathologies which need to be cured or treated. The narrative approach is supposed to be more humanizing for patients and their relationships with their mental health provider. This, it is argued, is a more effective approach to reaching goals for patients; that is, goals such as hope, happiness, or living a life worth living (elsewhere, there are more specific explications of these goals).

There is a subtle pessimism about the” medical view” which is essential to the “narrative view.” The “narrative view” says that pathologies like depression cannot be treated with anti-depressants like an infection can be treated with antibiotics. Even if various symptoms of depression are suppressed by medication, it doesn’t necessarily mean that the goals for the patient are met. For instance, an anti-depressant might treat a patient’s insomnia, melancholy, and anxiety; however, the patient might not break unhealthy habits or know how to adjust to live a life worth living.

Now moving on to how romantic relationships might fit into the “narrative view.” There is an issue within the “narrative view” method between patient and provider. The role of the mental health provider is something like that of a guide: they use their expertise to direct the patient towards a meaningful goal. On the patient’s end, they are supposed to internalize these directives and execute them in order to manage their disease. However, despite whatever trust, rapport, or relationship the patient has to the provider, there is a barrier in receiving and internalizing the provider’s directives.

This is where romantic relationships, I suggest, might help. I want to make clear that I’m making a descriptive claim here; I’m not suggesting that one ought to find a relationship when faced with issues of mental health.